When I run with Katie we have a habit of finding ourselves in some deep conversations…
Last week we were talking during our cool-down jog, and started to discuss life (this is normal for us). At some point our conversation went something like this…
Katie: “I never want to be classified as just a _______. ”
Me: “You’re right… You know it’s sad that as we get older we become too defined… it’s scary.”
Think about it… as we age we become labeled by what we do. When you meet someone new, what’s the first thing (after names) that’s asked?
“So-n-so, tell me, what is it that you do?”
I’ve heard that we’re the only culture to do this.
We like labels and we enjoy subconsciously judging people (we don’t mean to, it’s just what we’ve been raised to do).
Who I Am.
With each month that passes, I am growing closer to the big 3-0 and to be honest I am welcoming this new decade.
As a kid, we aim to become teenagers, the age when we know EVERYTHING.
Once we’re teenagers, we long for freedom and dream of life in our twenties. We assume, that this is the time we turn into adults and understand life.
I say that’s bull.
The 20s is spent analyzing life and learning one lesson…
We will never understand life completely and we certainly don’t know ourselves (especially from 20-25). I’ve spent the later years of twenties laying down the foundation to building an understanding of myself. Learning to love myself and learning who I am.
It’s in my 30s that I see myself taking that knowledge and finally being comfortable applying it.
Does that make sense?
Basically, the 30s are going to be my hot years… or where I finally see myself as the confident woman I deserve to be. That we all deserve to be.
From my mud run this past weekend
So Who Are You?
Okay, so back to the initial topic… defining ourselves.
When someone asks me this question, I am hesitant to answer.
I don’t want to be defined by my jobs. To me it’s asking: Who am I?
I’m a trainer
I’m a blogger
I’m a wife
I’m a friend
I’m a cook
I’m a weight lifter
I’m a runner
I’m a business owner
I’m an impatient, neurotic perfectionist
I’m all of these things. But how do I express this?
Is it okay to say to list out all of these things when asked what it is that I do?
But I think it’s important for us to remind ourselves either on a weekly or even a daily basis everything that we do. It’s easy to get wrapped up into classifications and doing so can hurt our goals.
Don’t Stop Short
Here’s perhaps the best example I can give, and I’ll go ahead an apologize if you don’t agree as I am not a mom yet… but I think many people can understand this.
If you’re defined as a mom day in and day out, before you know it that’s all that resonates.
Suddenly, being a mom overtakes all the things you used to love. Workouts, running, job ideas, etc, get pushed aside and over time forgotten. Years pass and suddenly you remember… oh, I used to run but before I had kids. Or, I wanted to do ____, then I got busy with the family.
Again, this is just one example, it doesn’t have to be the “mom” card, any job can be inserted here. And I’m not saying all moms are like this, but I think it’s a relatable idea.
Realize You Can Do It All
After my talk with Katie, I realized something… that if you really want something, you can make it happen.
I heard a quote that said something along the lines of…
If you didn’t try then you didn’t want it bad enough.
I think that’s true. We are so much more than what we do for our day jobs. Remind yourself of that.
I get so caught up in business that I sometimes forget that I deserve to do everything else I love. That’s why I wake up before 5am to meet up with my friends for run club. It’s why I don’t feel guilty meeting a friend for lunch when I have a to-do list and it’s why I love taking the afternoon off to paddle board.
The “I Am” Challenge
Sit down for just 2 minutes (set a time for 2 minutes) and complete the following:
See what you can come up with. The top 5 will be what is most important to you, so make sure to make them a priority this week.
Do you have deep conversations during workouts?
What are 3-5 words that describe you?
Clearly, I am guilty of getting serious during workouts. It’s the best time to vent!