Consumer Report: The Painful Pants Post

Okay I know I just talked about how much I love Under Armour but that was before something terrible happened.

I mean something so terrible that I can’t even lay on my mattress. And no, I am not being over dramatic.

(Side note: I still love UnderArmour). 

I bought a pair of running pants a while ago that had this cute little zipper right above my butt. At the time I thought it was an ingenious idea. No more tying my car key into my shoe laces, now I can easily zip it into the awesome “secret” compartment! Score, right?

Not so score.

I wore these magical pants to do a workout yesterday and learned they’re the worst idea ever not so great for gym workouts. Sure they looked cute, they made my butt look lifted and perky but that stupid, annoying, worthless zipper killed me.

Take a look: 

I apologize for the near butt shot. 

Note to self don’t do windshield wipers or other core exercises that require laying on your back when wearing zipper pants.

Yes, I knew it was hurting during the workout, but I didn’t imagine it to cause bruising and even a knot to form. At one point during all these windshield wipers, I decided that maybe if I open the pocket to move the zipper to the other side it would help? Nope, I just have two identical bruises and a very sore lower back.

But I still love my pants, I just have to make a mental note to wear them strictly for what they’re made for: Running!

In terms of fitness pants (I love capris), I might as well give some tips on the perfect pair and how to care for them.

My perfect pair: 

These are my favorite, the waist band is comfortable, it doesn’t “push” everything up and the material of the capris are almost silky. They rock.

Shopping And Care Guide For Awesome Workout Pants

  1. Avoid “shaping” shorts and pants. If they promise to squeeze in fat, what that really means is squeeze it to some place else. They aren’t as flattering as they seems. That could mean increased muffin tops or thunder thighs, but in my experience it seems to always mean bigger love handles. Extra love anyone?
  2. Get your size. By watching some of my youtube videos, I have learned the importance of buying your size. I have some unflattering videos floating around out there simply because I refused to get the next size up. You’ll look much more flattering if you get the size that looks best on you. And keep in mind that most spandex runs small, so don’t freak out if you have to get a size larger than you normally do.
  3. Never dry. In terms of caring for your workout pants, don’t toss them in the dryer. It will break down the fibers and before you know it you’ll be forced to purchase new ones. Remember my embarrassing workout shorts story? Trust me its no fun to realize you have holes in “no-no” areas while you’re working out… really, take my word for it.
  4. Dress for what you are doing. It’s annoying but some shorts and pants are very sport specific. Don’t wear a pair of loose running shorts to the gym. When you’re on a bench or doing core work everyone will be able to look at your personal no-no spots. If you do wear loose clothing, wear a pair of compression shorts underneath. Avoid embarrassment if possible!


  • Have you ever had a wardrobe slip up? 
*I am not endorsed by any brands I discuss, I simply like to share what works and doesn’t work well with me. These are my own opinions. 

PS: The Winner of the Vegan Protein was Stacy!



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