Spousal Envy: Why My Husband Loses Weight Faster

Tell me you know what I’m talking about? I love my husband with all of my heart, I mean how can I resist this face:

men lose weight faster

With that being said, it can be extremely frustrating when I work my tush off to see results from my diet and workouts only to feel as if no results are coming my way…

Dan on the other hand, can make one small change and comment after just a few days about seeing results.

Ugh. I mean seriously… I’ve never seen him doing planks while cleaning, yet he is the one with the 6-pack abs!

plank while cleaning

Not only that but let’s talk weight… after being married for about a year, I stepped on the scale to see I had gained about 10 pounds. Where and when did that happen? It was around this time that I went vegan, thinking that I would drop those extra pounds quickly. I didn’t.

Someone that did lose weight? My husband. And let’s face it, he doesn’t need to. His problem as always been his need to gain weight. I know, eye roll here.

But in all seriousness, his losing weight is just as frustrating to him as me gaining weight. And while this isn’t the case with all couples, I know that wives often get frustrated when their husbands see results with weight loss and toning before they do.

What gives?

Are the men working harder, are they more dedicated? Ummm, that’s a big fat no.

The answer is simple… it’s easier for them to drop fat.

Here’s a statistic I read over at Shape:

If a man and woman are the same height and weight, the man will burn roughly 20% more calories per day than the woman. 

Let’s discuss!

Why Do Men Lose Weight Faster Than Women?

80s aerobics

Halloween, pretty sure I went and ate some brownies right after this picture was snapped.

Food Preferences

When I am having a bad day, what is the first thing that pops into my mind? Enjoying a big ole’ chocolate chip cookie. Men… not as much. Men crave more “meaty” protein filled foods while women are more likely to have cravings for sweet filled carbohydrates.

This works in their favor because:

A. Once they make the decision to make smarter food choices, they tend to give up sugar filled junk foods easier.

B. Protein can actually help lose weight. Unlike simple carbs (the cookies, chocolate, cakes), protein is broken down slowly and takes work for the body to break down. So the guys feel fuller longer, and their body burns off more calories just by breaking down their steaks.

Women on the other hand, after enjoying a carb-filled snack or meal will be hungry pretty soon… since carbs begin to breakdown in your mouth! Faster digestion, means faster food cravings.

men more muscle

Our honeymoon 2010… I worked my butt off while he just did his “normal” thing to get prepped for the big day.

Metabolic Powerhouses

Unfortunately (or fortunately) men have more muscle mass then women naturally (due to testosterone)… muscle is a very metabolic tissue which means that the more muscle mass a person has, the more calories they burn daily. If a guy cuts back on his calories and adds in a great exercise program then changes are that he will be burning off more calories each day. This of course translates into more pounds lost each week.

This is the issue with Dan… he used to avoid cardio like the plague! That’s changed in the past few months as he is trying to get in all-around better shape (cardio and strength), and he did see the number on the scale go down almost instantly.

men relax

Relax, everything will just take care of itself

Just Forget About It

When you’re dieting, how often do you jump on the scale? How many minutes each day do you spend thinking about your diet, the weight you need to lose, the workout you need to do, etc?

We tend to become obsessed with it… and when we do that only causes more issues. Stressing out about our physical bodies leads to emotional eating, increase in fat hoarding hormones (ghrelin), and lack of motivation.

Basically, for women if we don’t see results fast enough, we want to give up.

Men on the other hand are better at taking it day by day. Studies show that they don’t worry about their physical appearance as much and because of it are more laid back with their results… which of course allows them to keep moving forward for the long run. Of course they have their insecurities too… but not like us. I have NEVER heard a man complaining about what size his pants are or what the scale read this morning.


Kitchen Time

This is more of something I have just noticed in my home and from talking with my clients. I realize that not all women are in charge of meals, but in my house I am. I do the stopping, I plan the meals out, I cook the dinners (except for this past weekend).

I have changed my ways since I realized what I was doing but here it goes: I was a “food taster”. Anytime I was in the kitchen cooking dinner or baking something, I had to nibble away to make sure everything was good to go. By the time dinner was on the plate, I had probably consumed a half portion.

Realizing I was doing this helped a lot and now I make it a point for Dan and I to both be surprised!

This is just a secret calorie zone that women are more likely to find themselves again, making it easier for the guys to keep their calories in check while we aren’t even realizing what we’re doing!

Have you ever found yourself frustrated or jealous of your husband/boyfriend at how easy losing weight seems to be for him?
What else isn’t fair between the sexes? 


  • omgosh…Josh can literally think about losing weight and it happens. It is SO frustrating!

    • I know, Dan’s the same! When we gave up wine for the month of Jan, he gave up early because he was losing weight! lol, the wine = calories for him! Go figure.

  • My husband and I are the EXACT sameway as you and your husband. He wants to “put on pounds” of muscle and I can’t imagine ever saying that! We’re currently doing jillian michaels 90 day body revolution and I’m kicking his butt 😉 he’s still skinnier than me but soon I’m gonna be in such good shape he’s gonna be jealous! Hahaha

    • That is awesome Savannah! Kick his tush! 🙂

  • This post. Oh em gee. I had this discussion (read meltdown) over the weekend when I stepped on the scale and voiced my frustrations with my husband (since my wedding over a year ago I gained 15lbs and am trying to lose it). I kill myself trying to shed the lbs and he just loses the weight so easily after tweaking one thing (ie. going to light mayo from full fat and brown rice over white). It is so frustrating!

    • It’s so weird how that 1st year seems to creep the pounds on! We lived together for years before and that never happened! You’ll be able to hit your goals! Just don’t focus on your husband and let his success deter you.

  • I can totally relate to this one! My husband doesn’t even eat half as well as me and as soon as he adopts some sort of exercise routine, his weight magically falls off. That said, I really am guilty of the cooking/sampling routine and should get that under control!

    • I know it’s as if they have a “magic” ability! Ugh!

  • What a great post! I didn’t know all of this! Thanks!

  • MaureenL

    I’m in the same boat! Always jeoulous of how quickly my husband can lose weight and he is also trying to gain – such a nice problem to have. I am guilty of the “food tasting” as well and after realizing this months ago I only allow myself to snack on the green veggies like raw green beans, broccoli or peppers.

    • It’s great that you realized the food tasting! Now my husband laughs at me when I ask him to taste test, because I don’t want to! One “taste” and before you know it only 1/2 is being served! lol

  • Nick gained weight when I was pregnant and I tracked calories for one month, and he he lost the weight, I am still working, ugh.

    • You’ll get there! At least he gained it with you! 🙂

  • Oh, men :). I always tell my husband, “I wish you were the one that had cramps.” When I complain about them, he just doesn’t get it. It’s also not fair that it takes them like 5 minutes to get ready in the morning!

    • I agree!! They should have to step in to our shoes for a day

  • I’m totally with you on the food tasting in the kitchen. Not so much with dinner, but anytime I’m baking it’s the worst. I’m a sucker for licking the bowl afterward…and every other utensil I used in the process.

    • Mine is a weakness while baking too! I always safe a bite of dough if it’s cookies or a spoonful (or 2) of batter. Can’t help it… gotta make sure what I am making is going to be good!

  • It used to make me crazy!!! My boyfriend and I did the Slow Carb diet a few years ago. He lost 25 pounds and I gained 2. I was so annoyed. Now, I’m over it. I just know he’s always going to have an easier time losing weight (i.e. he could just stop drinking beer for a month and the fat melts off, me on the otherhand…..not so much). I don’t compare myself anymore!

    • I completely understand! You’re so right, just gotta stop comparing and move forward with what works for you!

  • I expected this article to be full of obvious things but I loved that you pointed out some key aspects.
    First that we are usually the ones in the kitchen. I also clean the kitchen so I just spend more time there than he does. Plus I know where we hide the cookies :]

    Secondly that men are more relaxed and don’t stress as much about their bodies. I just joined a little weight loss challenge to lose my extra “newly-wed weight”. I was two months in when my hubby decided to get on board. I was weighing myself every day – 5 times a day. I was hardly losing weight and he just casually lost double the weight I had in weeks!

    Thanks for addressing this issue that drives us so crazy :]

    • Thanks Emily! I def don’t want to just hit on points where you simply roll eyes and say, “duh”, so I am glad I succeeded! you’ll hit your goal soon!

  • Abbi

    Great post! And yes. 🙂

  • yes david has a rockin body but he does indulge in daily cookies and enjoys his pizza. I do think he eat more meals and less snacks that I do. I also agree that muscle mass plays a HUGE role…as does being a lucky bastard. I kid, I love him too 🙂

  • Found this from Lindsay @ The Lean Green Bean… and I cannot express how glad I am I found this. My boyfriend and I are polar opposites when it comes to eating. He eats junk, ZERO vegetables, and lots of fatty foods. Granted he works out quite a bit, he still cannot gain any weight regardless of the crap he is eating.
    Then there’s me who eats quite healthy, work out & GAIN weight. It has started to affect our relationship negatively.

    I need to keep this post and information in my head next time we start arguing about such things. Thanks 🙂

    • I know it can be frustrating! I’m glad you found me over here, yes the next time you guys start arguing it’s important to realize that it’s really not his fault… most men suck. 🙂

      I used to get upset too seeing my husband eat and drink what he wanted to see the scale go down… but that’s just him and if anythign it makes me even more proud of my body because of how I have to work for it.

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  • Maryanne Eagleson

    I know my diet is working because my husband is losing weight. That has become my new saying. And it’s true. When I start a better eating plan, he has to join me. He tells me it looks so good and healthy and he wants to try it. As soon as he does, he loses weight. That’s my proof that the eating plan is working…BUT not for me. I have come to the conclusion it is not the plan but my female hormones. That’s why I am going to a specialist to help me figure out what my hormones are doing or not doing.

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