I don’t want to be skinny, at least not today.
This was the topic of conversation yesterday morning between my friends Katie, Michelle and myself during our cool down jog.
Skinny isn’t appealing, it doesn’t sound healthy and it isn’t setting a good example to friends, family and my clients.
I feel like “skinny” has morphed into something completely different then what it was 20 years ago. 20 years ago, being skinny was a compliment, it was the look women wanted to achieve.
But more than anything, skinny up until 10 years ago, was healthy.
Growing up, I had several nicknames to reflect my tall, slender body (I was always the tall kid until I stopped growing around age 12).
Lil’ Twiggy (My grandfather called me Lil’ Twiggy and my mom was Twiggy)
You could be described as skinny but still have feminine curves, toned muscles.
I feel that description is no longer valid.
We are currently in a culture where boundaries are always trying to be pushed. When models of the 80s were “skinny” I am sure they thought they simply couldn’t get any thinner (like Claudia above).
Those models compared to the ones that grace magazines and runways today wouldn’t be given a second look. Well, perhaps for a plus-sized gig.
Which is sad.
No, You Don’t Want To Be Skinny
When I sit down and talk with new clients, often times they’ll confess their desire to be skinny. As soon as I can see the “s” word making it’s way up, before it has a chance to make it’s debut…
I correct them.
“No, you don’t want to be skinny. You want to be healthy.”
There has been a lot, and I mean a lot, of talk going on right now about Miley Cyrus. I’m not going to open that whole can of worms here, I have nothing to say in regards to her personal choices. However, I will say this…
Her body doesn’t look strong, it doesn’t look confident…
It looks Frail. Breakable. Skinny.
It’s sad, that this is the look that women and young adults are pressured to compare themselves too. After all, she was the #1 Maxim Hottie!
It’s sad, that there are times when I look in the mirror and wonder: Am I thin enough?
It’s that word… ENOUGH that gets us into trouble.
Are you fit enough? Thin enough? Toned enough? Fast enough? Strong enough?
But enough compared to who?
Dan and I don’t have a television. I know that that sounds completely insane. But it’s liberating on so many levels.
We eat lunch and dinner together at a table (something I never did growing up with my family). We actually talk and spend time together, it’s nice. I love these moments.
We get a lot done! Working from home used to be distracting with the tv. Now, there isn’t an option.
But it’s more than that…
And I am not forced to look at “perfect” figures all the time. The people that the media glorifies and aims to make us feel inferior to. I am not comparing myself to these ladies asking if I am enough compared to them.
And because of that… when I ask, “Am I enough” the real question is:
“Am I enough for myself?”
Fight The Urge To Be Skinny
Because of decades of this word being hammered into our heads, it’s going to take some discipline and changes in the way we view ourselves to shake it out.
Have you ever heard the “fight the negative talk” technique?
It goes like this… for 30 days, each time you feel yourself getting ready to use a negative word such as don’t, no, won’t, etc… stop mid sentence and reword your thought to get rid of the negatives. After 30 days, you’ll be an all around more positive person.
Well, the same has to happen here: Each time you sense a “I wish I were skinnier” thought coming on, stop it dead in it’s tracks.
Then, think for a second about what you really want.
For me, I don’t want to be skinnier. I want to:
–> Drop 2% body fat
–> Put on 5-10 pounds of muscle
–> I want to be strong
–> I want curves
–> I want to be a woman.
These are healthy thoughts, thoughts that motivate me to be better, eat better, lift weights better, run faster, etc.
What about you:
What do you want to be?
Do you think “skinny” has changed over the past decade or two?